Impostor syndrome.
I thought this was something always talked about toward the beginning of college, at least it was at the start of my freshman year. At the time, I didn't realize the importance of this concept and therefore desire to share it with you as you begin, or continue, your college journey.
Oxford dictionary describes "imposture syndrome" as this: the persistent inability to believe that one's success is deserved or has been legitimately achieved as a result of one's own effort and skills.
Why is this key in your college experience? How does this apply to you?
For the first time, for most people, you are in a sea of people. People who likely look just like you, act like you, are accomplished and successful and have these big goals and you can't comprehend how you could've gotten *blank* when they exist in this place too. Does that ring a bell?
Girls who went through sorority recruitment as a new member, have you questioned how you ended up where you did? Girls who went through the inside of recruitment for the first time, did you question how you even ended up in a sorority? Have you received an interview or position of high attainment and when you look around you see people you feel are far more deserving than you? Welcome to the imposture syndrome.
I hate imposture syndrome, if you couldn't hear the hostility in this letter prior to, please hear it now. It is a stumbling block for so many girls already believing that they are not enough, not deserving, not special.
Here's my two cents and little advice I can give you:
1. Write down 3 qualities about yourself that you believe make you exceptional, ask a friend if you have to. Remind yourself of these three things when you feel the imposture syndrome creeping.
2. Turn to gratitude. Learn how to accept the things the Lord has given you by grabbing it and running, diving head first in what He has for you in this space, regardless of if you feel deserving or not.
3. Call it for what it is. Find this happening in your life and stomp on it. Give it a name, look it in the face, and choose to walk away humbly.
You are living a glorious, beautifully established life created for you and you alone by the Lord. Revel in it. Don't look back and feel like you spent more of this experience processing what you've accomplished and been given that you miss the beauty of what's in front of you.
Remember, you are more than a girl who "accidentally got this thing"...
Your friend,
Mary-Coker.
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